Day 27: A Much Improved Mood

After a night of sleep, I woke up feeling much better than I did the day before. Woke up late though and nearly missed my ride with Lois and Sam.

Lois felt confident about the Equipment exam we were going to take, so she wanted to get it over and done with. Despite feeling my feeling unprepared, we took the test at 8:30. After a mix-up with the answer key, Emma got our tests graded. For the first (and hopefully last) time, Lois outscored me by five points. But only missing one isn't too shabby I guess. Some people say you don't even NEED a safety stop. (Just kidding. Always do a safety stop.)

A bit frustrated, I talked to Peter who told me that several of the emails I formatted yesterday went out with an error. Maybe Steve Jobs can keep his job after all. Carl and Emma pulled me aside a bit later, and we talked about my options for working around my new diagnosis. From the sound of it, we'll just be pushing everything back, which should mean I'm finished before I have to leave. Looks like I'll have time for a job after all.

Carl suggested that I look for work aboard a dive boat, just to get exposure, and that I look to do it somewhere else along the coast. Maybe the Northies bouncers are cooler than him after all. I've not ruled it out though, as there is more of Australia that I'd like to see.

Peter later offered me a job servicing regulators and tanks for a couple months, which I might end up doing. I'd never thought I'd complain about having too many options for how I want to spend my time. Carl figured that I should know how to service a tank anyway, and showed me how it's done. Most of the process I had learned about in my Gas Blender course, but there was more to it than I expected. Carl gave me a valve to service by myself, and (pardon my humility) I did a damn good job. The tank even passed the "Will it Hold Air?" test, which is kinda important.

As always on Fridays, we had a divemaster meeting with Emma and Carl, which was just an overview of our schedules for next week. I have Wednesday off, so I can go to the ear specialist appointment I booked earlier today. With any luck, this doctor will be able to help me speed it up, or perform any necessary surgery. Getting the appointment was atrocious, but I'm hoping he'll have good news for me.

Didn't do too much after the meeting, and left once we had had our individual meetings. Sam, Lois and I met Caroline at the Intersection for dinner and a few drinks, which was all the excitement we'd have for the night. Turned in early again in an effort to prepare myself for the tomorrow night.

Yours in Swearing I'm Not an Old Man,
Robert

Day 26: Heartbreak in Bondi

Today was a day of great expectations, as I had an appointment with Dr. Harry, known to most as "The Dive Doctor." I took it as a good sign that I managed to wake up and make it to the train on time. It was an hour-long train ride from Cronulla to Bondi, which I used to study for tomorrow's Equipment exam (I sound just like a good student).

I arrived for my appointment at 11:30 on the dot and filled in all the necessary paperwork. After confirming that I am not and will not be pregnant, I was called into Dr. Harry's office. He took a look in each of my ear and without pause told me.
"You've got a huge hole in your eardrum."

Awesome.

He went on to tell me that you can see clear through to my middle ear (Physiology of Diving!) and said that it'd heal -if I'm atrociously lucky- in three months. I damn near cried. I could tell he felt bad for me, but there's nothing to be done. He did me the favor of drawing a picture of my eardrum (see below).

I let Carl know what had been said, and rang my mom in the States so she wouldn't worry. On my way back to the train station, I spotted a guitar shop that I hadn't seen when I first walked past. And like any responsible adult in a time of crisis, I bought a guitar. Not particularly fancy but it'll help me cope with being away from my acoustic at home. Had a spot of trouble with the train (I'll master public transit someday), and stopped in the bakery on my way home.

It's been a quiet night. Lois and I stayed in, her with a movie and me with my new guitar. Hopefully we haven't gotten too cocky about our exam tomorrow, as Peter says it's the one that most people fail. I've finished all the reading, so I'm feeling somewhat confident. And I think I absorb more information now that there's another hole in my head.

Yours in Self-Deprecating Humor,
Robert

Day 25: Robert Sees the End of Origin

As you may have seen, I spent the morning catching up on my beloved travel blog. I've been neglecting it while I try to get all of my readings done. And I've had some wicked computer trouble, and most of my work is now relegated to the tiny piece of working screen (k, done bitching now).

After I had typed out two or three, Peter set me to work fixing the auto-emails. I spent the afternoon writing new emails, finding any typos, and then setting up the routing codes for the emails I'd written. Fascinating stuff, right? Rachael took me aside for a break and showed me how to attach the regulator and high/low pressure hoses to the first stage valve (The first stage valve connects to the cylinder of air, and by routing the air to the regulator, makes the high pressure air breathable). Great timing, since I have my Equipment exam on Friday, and was a bit confused about the first stage's set up.

My day's work done, I headed for home with Carl and Rachael. Tonight was the second game of State of Origin, which would determine if NSW still had a chance to win it. The guys all went to Carl's house to watch the game. It would have been nice if team had showed up to play. Queensland whooped us soundly, I'll admit it. Cheatin' bastards.

Unlike the Blues, I was in spectacular form. I made it all the way to the end of the match without being asked to leave! Turns out Carl is much cooler than the Northies bouncers.

I rode home with Pixie, and settled into bed early. Tomorrow is my appointment with the dive doctor. I hope he has good news.

Yours in Crossing Fingers,
Robert

Dear Readers,

I know I've been slacking a bit, and for that you have my apologies. I'm having a bit of computer trouble at the moment, but as you can see I'm updating bits and pieces, and should be caught up soon.

Yours in Keeping Promises,
Robert

Day 22: We Gon' Party Like It's the Queen's Birthday

This was not an easy morning to wake up. The wine I'd had last night packed a punch, although it wasn't quite strong enough to burst any eardrums. Lois wasn't much better. Lucky for her, it was the last day of the Rescue Diver course, so she'd get to practice all the life-saving skills in water, while I slung suds (that's the hip lingo for "washing gear") back at the shop. After rallying and making it to the shop, Carl left with Lois and the other Rescue students in tow.

Unfortunately, my "filling tanks with reckless abandon" was not the best strategy for it, and many of the tanks were under-filled. I sent Carl a sincere apology text, and in true Aussie fashion he replied "No warries, mate." I know it was a bit of an inconvenience. But I'll be the best darned tank filler ever one day, you'll see!

After another day of getting my jeans sopping wet in the name of rental gear cleanliness, I began preparing myself for the experience that is Sunday night at Northies. Donning my best jeans and a shirt, I got my hair did by Lois and shaved off a week of beard growth. Needless to say, I was looking ridiculously good-looking.

If Sunday is the day for resting, the people of Cronulla haven't heard about it. The place was packed, the music loud, the drinks expensive. I had a great night though. To my dismay though, the girls were ready to leave after only an hour of dancing. And I had just gotten warmed up too...

We headed back to Sam's place for a bit; Lois, Sam, Caroline, and myself led the way, with Kristy valiantly trying to shake off a creepy guy in the rear (Not editing that, but you keep your mind out of the gutter.) Things kinda fizzled out for the night, so I headed home, leaving the girls to hang out. Tomorrow's my day off though, which will hopefully mean adventure.

Yours in Pourin' Out a Shot for the Queen,
Robert

Day 21: How Did It Take 21 Days for There to Be a Barbi?

Today was my first day of washing gear for hire. I caught a ride to the shop with Sam and Lois at an absurdly early 7. There wasn't much for me to do in the way of work until the shore dives for the day got back, so I sat in the back classroom and started reading for my Equipment exam. I was sharing the room with Peter, who would stop working every so often to dispense some of his worldly wisdom or to wake me up from my impromptu naps.

Things picked up in the afternoon. Before the rental gear was returned, I filled tanks for the next day's dives. Doing my very best not to blow the compressor, I filled with reckless abandon. Around 3, the divers returned, their soaking gear in tow. I ran around, rinsing fins and regulators, shampooing wet suits, and generally soaking the bejeezus out of my jeans. I managed to get the gear washed and stowed with some help from the others and headed home. I do not envy the kid who does that every weekend.

Tonight Kristy - one of the instructors - had a BBQ, my first in Australia. Considering the country's reputation for "throwing a shrimp on the barbi" I'm shocked it's taken this long. Winter is no excuse for not living up to stereotypes.

Lois and I walked over to Kristy's after getting ready, stopping at the bottle shop on our way. She selected two bottles of a nice red, and I chose for myself a full-bodied Carlton Draught. There was no way this night could turn out badly. We arrived and were given a quick tour of the apartment. I was then kicked out to the porch to grill with Pixie and Carl.

We spent the next hour or so doing what men do best: cooking meat outside. Despite immolating the sausages, we did an incredible job on the steaks, much to everybody's surprise. We remained outside for dinner, so we could enjoy the fruits of our labor, and so Carl could give me hell for being American. When it seemed as though some of the girl were enjoying their wine a little too much, most of the guests headed for home. Lois insisted on staying a while longer before we walked home with Emma. I had had a glass of wine myself and went straight to bed after downing some water, in hopes of staving off the wine hangover.

Yours in Nighttime Hydration,
Robert

Day 20: "How did you miss the question about the ears?"

I could put it off no longer, it was time to take the Physiology of Diving exam. Although Lois and I were scheduled to take the test at 8 AM, in a move that proved her worth as a study buddy and roommate, she convinced Emma to let us take the test in the afternoon. I knew there was a reason I keep her around.

Leaving Lois to her cram session, I joined Carl in the back classroom to do a last bit of reading and review for myself. Carl was busy answering emails all morning, but managed to find time to answer questions I had and make jokes about my ear. I must admit, he's getting quite clever at relating just about anything to a ruptured eardrum. Even an untied shoelace is related to the tympanic membrane these days. It's all in good fun, but one of these days Alice...

All of this reading about the human body and diving has given me cabin fever. It's now been nearly two weeks of being landlocked for me and I get more restless by the day. Carl says that once my ear is healed, he'll teach me how to freedive. Essentially, frediving is the same as scuba diving, except for the lack of a tank of air on your back. You take a single breath before swimming as far down as you can get. Carl can make it to 30m/100ft, and the world record is in the neighborhood of 250m/820ft. Hopefully I can get down at least as deep as Carl by the time I'm forced to go back to the States.

By 2PM, Lois and I were ready to face the music. We received the tests and separated. I didn't find it to be terribly difficult, only guessing on three or four questions. When we had both finished, we were graded and much to our surprise, we each missed two questions. Carl was particularly amused that one of the questions I missed was on the subject of ear injury. In my wildest dreams, I hope to one day live down my reputation as "The Ear Guy."

Before heading for home, Carl and Emma met with each of the divemaster candidates (Lois, myself and Michael), to discuss our schedules and the course. Nothing terribly special, but it's nice to know that they're keeping track of everything so we get the most out of our time here. Peter offered me a job washing gear for this weekend, so I can earn a bit of money until I find a job that won't interfere with my coursework.

Monday is a public holiday in celebration of the Queen's birthday, so there's going to be all kinds of stuff going on this weekend. With that in mind, Lois and I decided to have a calm night, and hung out with Sam rather than going out. I went to bed early in preparation for the day of work I had ahead.

Yours in Bed Early on a Friday Night,
Robert

Day 19: Look Out Steve Jobs

Today was my introduction to the world of marketing! Spent an hour reading for my Physiology exam before Peter set me to work.

The first order of the day was learning how the shop keeps in touch with their customers, and how the customer aspect of the shop software, EVE. I was surprised by the numbers of ways they use to keep customers coming back. How many other stores do you see sending texts to tell customers about sales? Exactly.

I was then tasked with analyzing some of the numbers from the customer files: how many people signed up for a certain course and that sort of thing (nothing personal, for those of you who were wondering). Three hours and a lunch break later, I was staring at a sheet of calculations and percentages. Microsoft Excel did most of the heavy lifting, but I managed to get the percentages of students signing up for a certain course, which was the point of it all.

These numbers in hand, Peter had me spend the afternoon writing target emails to get these students diving again. Lesson for the day: the fine art of being pushy enough to sell something without ending up in the junk folder. By the end of the day, I had a few solid-looking drafts that we might end up using. Not a bad for a day's work, I'd say.

I spent the night in, studying for the Physiology exam with Lois. Took a break to run, but there wasn't much more excitement than that. Hopefully the weekend will make up for the slow nights.

Yours in Selling a Lifestyle,
Robert

Day 18: Blending Gasses in a Socially-Acceptable Manner

After vowing not to go to bed until I had finished my Gas Blender theory, I woke up with three chapters left to do. Not the kind of thing that'll wake you up in the morning, but I managed to cover everything before Joe picked me up.

The lecture for the theory lasted close to three hours, and it was getting dark by the time we left, but I learned a great deal today. Mainly, I learned all the ways of mixing blends of oxygen and nitrogen used in specialized diving; in theory and in somewhat-terrifying practice. And I even got certified! My first real cert here in Australia! The way I figure, if I can manage to learn such a dull subject, I'll do well in the stuff that's more difficult but interesting (I'm looking at you, Physiology of Diving).

Much to his surprise, Joe was there to earn his instructor's cert in Gas Blending, so I had a chance to see how PADI instructors are instructed to... instruct. I got to be the test student while Joe went through the process of explaining a question I "missed". Like the giving a dive briefing, when I see how it's done, I feel confident that I'll be able to teach people dive theory. Hopefully, I'm still as confident when it's me up there being graded by Peter.

The bookwork out of the way, Joe and I learned to not only fill a tank with a nitrox mix, but how to completely dismantle and clean a scuba tank for use with nitrox. To my slight disappointment, we were not made to reassemble the tanks on top of our footlockers in the barracks. Maybe next time. We both passed the test without much pain, and headed home. On the drive to Cronulla, Peter gave us advice on diving, and on life in general. My favorite bit: "Everything in life is simple. Human beings are stupid, and if they've managed to survive, then everything else must be simple." I hope the wisdom is still there, despite the lack of context. I also hope that it means the upcoming Physics test won't be that hard.

Quiet night again, although I did take some time out to go for a run around Cronulla. Nothing like running along the ocean esplanade to make one think (and keep one awake past his bedtime).

Yours in Worthwhile Insomnia,
Robert

Day 17: How to Photograph A Bee's Ass

Today I sat in on Joe's Digital Underwater Photography Instructor course, as taught by Carl. We spent the morning learning how to properly take a picture on dry land and talking about the challenges presented by underwater photography. Much emphasis was placed on macro photography, which is a fancy way of saying "make small things look awesome." (Please keep your jokes to yourselves.) Afterward, we walked around the neighborhood behind the shop, practicing our new skills. Carl led our photo safari, giving tips and feedback to help us out. I was disappointed by the fact that my final shots weren't much better than my first couple shots, but I still felt I made some progress.

Ready for underwater shooting, we drove to The Steps, a dive site in Kurnell. I've heard stories of amazing sights to be seen at The Steps, so I was excited to go. The entry point Carl and Joe used is known as The Leap, as it calls for the diver to jump off the side of a rock and plummet into the ocean. I scrambled out to the end of a nearby rock to film their death-defying jump, and after they descended, explored the dive site. The Leap was at the bottom of a small cliff that has been carved out by the ocean over the years, which is an incredible sight. I snapped a few pictures of the area to post here, rather than trying to put it all into words. (Coming very soon.)

Since the guys were on a drift dive, I got to drive the truck down to the exit point, the first driving I've done in Australia. Despite signaling a turn with the windscreen wipers, I made it safely down the harrowing hundred-yard stretch of road to the exit point, The Steps. Although the diving community tends to be cryptic in the naming of their dive sites, I will boldly assume the site got its name from the stairway down to the ocean. Also an impressive place, with ocean-hewn rocks lining the bottom of the cliff. Near the path down is a sacred Aboriginal site, which Carl said was very important to the Botany Bay Aborigines. He also pointed out a column carved into the rock, a remnant of the first Western settlers. While waiting for Joe and Carl to surface I explored the area, practicing my macro photography on the way.

After the two dives were over, I got to hear stories and see pictures of of the giant rays and weedy seadragons they had seen . Never have I wanted to go diving more. I hoped the cabin fever wouldn't set in for a while longer, but I'm starting to get all ants-y in my pants-y. But on the bright side, Joe had some awesome pictures from the dives, so the day was a success.

We debriefed at the shop, and headed home, as Joe and I have a Gas Blender course tomorrow. It's tedious reading, but it'll be a good course to have under my belt. Still have a bit more left, a chapter to finish and mixes to learn before I sleep. And mixes to learn before I sleep.

Yours in Blog Post Rambling,
Robert

Day 16: Talkin Shop and Misfired Spears

Today was an early one. Didn't sleep much, I suspect one of the naps I took the day before is culprit. I was up before the sun today. Mark "The General" and I were picked up by Carl and Rachael around 6:30, the General off on some adventure, and I tagging along to a PADI conference.

The conference would be taking place at a country club in North Sydney (if my bearings serve me). The Fallons and I arrived an hour and a half before the conference started. So naturally Carl and I pay for a round of golf. And despite my years of golfing in high school, my ass was thoroughly handed to me. To be fair, we only played six holes. I guess come-from-behind wins haven't made it to Australia yet.

Around 9 AM, we were forced to give up the gentleman's game to sit down for the conference. Although incredibly long and, at some bits, horribly tedious, I found the talks to be very informative. It was a Business Solutions Seminar, so we spent the better part of the day learning how to bring in customers, and how to run marketing campaigns. Things of that sort. Had a rather fancy lunch, which included the tale of my burst eardrum, naturally. The final talk was a tad long for my taste, although not entirely uninformative. Managed to make it home in record time, which made me just in time for dinner. Which came in handy.

Around 6, Carl rang me, and gave me directions to his friend's house, just down the street. And because I'm still deaf in one ear, I got lost. After my brave rescue by Carl and the gang, and a bit of carrying boxes I was volunteered for, we settled in for a sort of housewarming dinner. And after dealing with some Portuguese-style chicken, Carl and I sat on the balcony with Neil/Pixie (Carl's friend). Of course the talk turned to scuba diving, and I brought up how excited I was to go spearfishing. Pixie just happened to have a spear gun, and that's when things got, as the kids say, b-a-n-a-n-a-s.

Carl decided to make a show of his manliness, and stretched back on of the rubbers to fire the gun (when not in heavily residential areas of course). The butt of the gun pressed to his sternum, Carl pulled with all his might to pull the huge rubber band back. Unfortunately, all his might couldn't get the band back the last half inch, and the rubberband took flight taking the spear gun with it. We watched in awe as it took flight over the balcony and land in the garden a story below, in what may have been the neighbors garden. I managed to climb my way down the building and retrieve the spear gun before the nice gentleman who's plants had just been speared could notice me. Carl, the consummate professional as always, made the executive decision to put the gun away. That's why he's my mentor.

Left soon after, arrived home to find Lois a bit tipsy from her girls night out with the women-folk from the dive shop. After agreeing upon a time to wake one another up, I set the soundtrack from Up! to lull us to sleep. But I skipped "the scary songs," as Lois says.

Yours in Strange Soundtrack Selections,
Robert

Day 15: Ibuprofen and Eggs, Breakfast of Champions

Woke up this morning to Lois's alarm, and feeling like my brain had grown a few sizes too large in my sleep. Managed to rally for breakfast, then back to bed for a bit. Attempted to make a trip to Manly with Carl, but my late start in the day resulted in me missing the train. Returned home after meandering through the mall, and broke in through the window, as I haven't seen my keys in several days. Bummed around the rest of the day, reading a bit here, listening to music a bit there.

Tonight was the celebration for the newly certified instructors at the Intersection. Despite losing an ear there only a week ago, made the journey to Ramsgate to join the celebrations. Managed to catch the train to Kogarah this time, and wound up in what may have been Little China. After walking a mile in the wrong direction, into a neighborhood that was probably dangerous for someone with a pretty face like mine, I called a cab and arrived without incident. Not surprisingly, everyone was fairly smashed by the time I showed up. Or at least everyone was drinking, and Carl and Joe were pretty smashed. As always, a good time. Managed to choke down a Toohey's or two, and joined everyone in having a Jägerbomb. After last night, I figured it best to be responsible and limit myself.

Eventually, the Intersection couldn't hold our attention anymore, so we headed to Northies. In spectacular form as always, the Northies bouncers refused to let Joe in, and as it was kinda his night to shine, we joined him outside. Northies isn't even that cool anyways.

The wind taken out of our sails, we decided to call it a night at 8:30. I sat in my room for a good hour deciding whether or not to rally, and go back to Northies solo. But sensibility won out, and I'll be going to bed after this is posted. I figure the last thing my ear needs at the moment is some deafening house music. Next weekend, scantily clad women of Northies, next weekend.

Yours in Getting Too Old for This,
Robert

p.s. I found my keys! So those of you worrying that I'd turn to a life of crime after having to break into my own room can now sleep soundly.

Day 14: I'm Never Drinking with Tiffany Again.

Today was my day off again, so I spent it like any respectable guy my age would: passed out in bed. Spent some time wandering through the mall for the afternoon, and picked up some paper and markers so Lois and I can add some color to the room. Attempted to wrap my head around some dive physiology after dinner, then settled in for a quiet night.

Then Lois arrives home, riding shotgun in a car full of already drunk people. They invited me to join them, and without much persuasion, I did. It was a moment for the Bad Decision Hall of Fame.

The night started out rather tamely, having a few beers at Sam's place, and I though the highlight of the night would be the visit we received from an awesome possum. Whoever insisted we do shots had different ideas entirely.

I'll break the travel blog-writer's creed here, and go light on the details. What I will include, for the sake of intrigue: spent a good half an hour speaking as Tiffany, my sorority-girl alter ego, insisted on playing guitar, got lost for a bit in the garden, had a nap on the porch, and left wearing a girl's jacket. Not my best of nights, but I woke up in the morning, so it can't have been that bad.

And I didn't throw up in my Ugg boots!

Yours in Not Looking Forward to the Morning,
Robert

Day 13: I Think I Was Productive?

Today was dedicated entirely to working on a few projects Carl's been giving me over the past couple of days. No joke, there's a ton of work that goes into making a shop run. Something I've been taking for granted, clearly. I'm now attempting to teach myself how to do some hardcore target marketing. So if you have any brilliant ideas, or just plain ideas, feel free to send them my way. I'm also working on documenting my trip for people who might be interested in doing an internship with Abyss. Which you're now reading!

Not planning on much for tonight, maybe going down to the pub for a bit. I'm currently hanging on to my money until I can find a job, which restricts my fun.

But there's always theory waiting!

Yours in Falling Asleep on Books,
Robert

Day 12: A Day of Theory

I spent all day in the classroom today. I'll be starting a gas blender course next week, which Carl hopes will keep me from ruining anymore nitrox fills haha. Halfway through the manual on mixing ratios and flow rates, I realized how little I missed my doomed semester in chemical engineering. But luckily most of the science I'll run into I've already learned, or have seen and attempted to learn. Should be smooth sailing.

I also spent a good part of the day reading divemaster theory, which is fairly easy but terribly draining. Finished up with a bit of hands-on work with EVE, the shop software.

I know, you can hardly stay in your seat, this is terribly exciting. Once my ear is healed I'll be doing all sorts of underwater breathing, and swimming, and running and jumping and shooting fish with spears. So stay tuned!

Yours in Remembering How to Sign Off Properly,
Robert

Day 11: "If I hear a bang, I'll be sure not to hurry out."

After two days of time off I was ready to be productive. Today's main lesson was on filling nitrox tanks. For the non-divers, nitrox is a mix of air (about 79 percent nitrogen, 21 percent oxygen) and pure oxygen, making a blend that's more oxygen rich than regular air. This allows divers to stay down longer, which is awesome.

I know, this may sound boring, but it's by far the most nervous I've been so far in my trip. Pure oxygen is prone to fires and explosions, and in a room full of tanks filled with pressurized air? Not something to take lightly. Add to that the hissing and creaking of the pipes, and the heat that comes from forcing air into the tank. I spent the better part of the morning in legitimate fear for my life. Peter left me to fill the last tanks on my own, leaving me with the quote above. After a while though, I managed to get my swagga' back, and was filling tanks like a champ. Then I got to learn how to test the tanks for the oxygen percentage. Even a slight percentage difference can mean death in the right circumstances. I managed to get the first few tanks, but the last few (the tanks when I had my swagga' back) were miserably wrong, making me an almost murderer. Luckily, the Abyss staff can fix that sort of thing, and it was only my first time.

The rest of the day I spent learning about nitrox diving, so I can use the tanks I don't mess up, and learning how to run the dive shop software. Bit of a slow afternoon, but book learnin does the body good.

Again, the night wasn't very eventful, so I was asleep around 10. Party animal!

Days 5-10: Not Dead in a Ditch, Just Disconnected

Due to my now-intermittent internet connection, I haven't posted anything in almost a week. So to make it up to you, here's everything you've missed.

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Day 5: (Thursday) An Introduction to Camp Cove
Jan, the Open Water candidate from Wednesday had another three dives to make before getting his cert, so off we went to Camp Cove, a site just inside the mouth of the Sydney Harbor. Not only is it a fairly easy dive site, I'm told the beach is home to nudist sunbathers in warmer weather, which should make diving there interesting. Lois and I observed as Cem ran Jan through the last of his skills tests. I even had a chance to participate, as a tired diver needing towing, and as a navigation point. Baby steps. Not too many fish I haven't seen on other dives, although I did see my first pufferfish in Australia. May not sound exciting, but it's kinda funny to see this tiny fish give you the evil eye then turn into a spiky ball. Not too much went on Thursday night, just had a drink or two at Northies with Emma and Lois. I was feeling so wild, I made it until 10:30 before I fell asleep

Day 6: (Friday) Learning to Be Social and A Surprise
Every weekend, Abyss offers free shore dives for anyone who'd like to come. As I'm a bit behind on my required number of dives, that includes me. The site of the day was again, Camp Cove! On the bright side, the sun was out all day, which hadn't happened yet. My ride to the dive, Frank, was also my dive buddy. On the way, I worked on what seems to be a paramount divemaster skill: holding conversation.

In charge of the day's dive was recently-certified divemaster Dani, overseen by Cem. One of my favorite things about doing this internship is the opportunity it provides for me to see many different teaching and leading styles. Which hopefully means I'll be ready when it comes time for me to give a dive briefing or teach a course. We spent two hours on our dives today, not terribly eventful, but we did get a chance to explore the rocks on the other side of the cove, where several seahorses have allegedly been seen. I've started bringing my camera along on dives, so hopefully I'll soon be adorning this page with some photos. Still haven't seen a seahorse, but my hopes are high. I did however find an unopened condom floating near one of the rocks, which Lois and I presented to Dani as a congratulatory medal. Then we headed back to the dive shop, and for the first time since Lois moved in, we stayed in for the night. She's a terrible influence, hopefully she won't be the death of me.

Day 7: (Saturday) And on the Seventh Day, He Dove at Camp Cove (And Was Soon Punished for the Sacrilegious Title)
Due to the awful weather that's been rolling in (the word cyclone is being tossed around), we were forced to make the day's dives at Camp Cove again. But I remained hopeful that I would see my elusive seahorse, and my sense of adventure was renewed. Today's divemaster was Emma, so I got to see how a seasoned pro handles dive briefings. Always learning, I am. Today's dives were good, great visibility and tons of fish I've never seen before. I managed to snap some pictures before the camera died, including some close ups of a very pissed octopus. In a brilliant move, I removed weights from my buoyancy control device (BCD) between dives, and spent the second dive gathering rocks to cram into my pockets. For you environmentalists reading along, I didn't disturb any sort of sea life the rocks, so settle down. After the dives, we headed to The Intersection, a pub down the road from the shop. Jamie, an instructor with Abyss was departing for Fiji, so going away celebrations were in order. After a few drinks, words were exchanged, and the unthinkable happened.

There are allegations that yours truly incited the events of this fateful night. I will neither confirm nor deny these slanderous words, in the sake of being impartial. Long story short, I received a slap to the face from my new friend, Lisa. Many say it was the slap heard round the pub. I say it was the last thing I heard on the right side of my ear that night. I wasn't in much of a party mood after that, but managed to get some dancing done at Northies to cheer me up. Then to bed with me.

Day 8: (Sunday) You Could Hear My Heart Break (But I Couldn't)
I awoke on Sunday to dried blood in my right ear. I live my life under the impression that as long as I'm not bleeding out of the ears, I'm in pretty good shape. So before I could even look at my wetsuit, I was ferried off to the waiting room for emergency patients. After ages of waiting, I was let in, only to be told (into my good ear) that I had ruptured my tympanic membrane and wouldn't be allowed in the water for four weeks, at the very least. In the meantime, I was the guy who got his eardrum popped in a bar. Sweet.

On the much more positive side, I would not be out of commission for the next few weeks. Peter and the other folks at Abyss created a schedule for me that would let me learn the business side of the industry. My family has thought about running a dive shop of our own once I graduate from college, so this experience will be extremely beneficial. Just another reason I'm thankful I went with Abyss. Got the rest of the day off to adjust to my new world of muddled sound.

Days 9 & 10: Less Thrilling Things Here
I was allowed to have these days off, since I only had one ear. I was productive for most of the days, so I don't feel too horrible about not going into the shop. Managed to open a bank account, should I find work in my time on the injured roster, and did quite a bit of theory study. Monday night, had a movie and brownie night at Emma's with Lois and Emma, which was fun. Got to bed early both nights, like a good little intern.

Caught up! (kinda...)

Day 4: State of Origin and Infamy

I hope to one day see the Sydney sun. Today was cold and wet, with rain coming down from sun-up until the sun set. Seems as though I bring the bad weather with me. Again, this would be the occasion for a sad face.

Today I got to sit on the skills training for a pair of Open Water Diver hopefuls. We began the morning in the pool, with Cem teaching skills and yours truly observing from the sidelines. As I progress in my training, I'll be more involved with the teaching process, but as it was my first day, I watched from the sidelines. There's a great deal to be learned from observing though, so I took in all I could. All the while, rain poured down, but as it was a heated pool we were saved from the discomfort of the heavens' deluge.

Once the pool skills were finished, we had a brief lunch, then headed off to the river for the first open water dive these new divers would experience. Unfortunately the cold was too much for Heather, one of our divers. Jan, the other Open Water-hopeful managed to tough out the twenty minute river dive, despite the rather cold temperature. I was pleasantly surprised by the coral formations in the river, which were host to several different species of fish. I'm a bit slow at learning the names of the fish, but I saw another cuttlefish, and what I believe to be a ton of very small jellyfish.

After spending a few soaking hours in the dive shop, I got home, scarfed some dinner, and managed to dry my clothes enough to head down to the pub. Tonight was the first game of State of Origin, a game of rugby equivalent to the American Super Bowl. The teams were essentially North against South, the New South Wales Cockroaches v. Queensland Cane Toads. I'm in NSW so the cheering was mostly for the Blues, although Queensland managed to steal the win for game 1. I left before the finish of the game, so I missed the despair that afflicted the rest of the pub. Here's to hoping the Cockroaches can pull it out for the next two of three.

Off to bed now, another three dives await me tomorrow.

Go Blue!,
Robert

Day 3: Into the Briny Shallow and Accidental Feats of Strength

I was up today before the sun, which I fear will soon become commonplace for me. I've vowed to never use an emoticon in the hallowed pages of this humble travel blog, but if I were to debase myself in such a fashion, this would be the occasion for it.

After a quick breakfast, I was ferried off to the dive shop, and just as quickly taken to the dive site. My first dives were to be on a little reef just off the path that follows the coast. My dive buddy for the day, Emma, led the way. I wasn't sure what to expect, and I was pleasantly surprised. I saw half a dozen types of fish I've never seen before, including two that looked as though they could be related to Gil, of Finding Nemo fame. We quickly befriended a massive blue grouper that followed us for most of our hour long dives. As if by some miracle, he managed to upend an urchin, which became a very loud lunch for him.

Considering my luck, I've been waiting for something bad to happen on this trip. Hopefully I've used up my share of bad luck today, when the key to the truck snapped in the door, locking us out of the car for a good hour. Which normally isn't a problem, but when you're standing around in a soaking wet suit, it can be sort of a buzz kill. Eventually though, we got it sorted, and made our second dive. Pretty uneventful dive, with the exception of a school of fish that must have numbered near a thousand, and a cuttlefish or two. We surfaced after about an hour, and I was dropped at home for a much-appreciated hot shower. Relaxed the rest of the day, and ended the night having a couple drinks with Carl and "three hot chicks" hahaha.

A quick aside, I now have a roommate, an English girl by the name of Lois. We'll be in the same courses all the way through instructor certification, so I'm sure we'll soon be fast friends. But for now, it's off to bed as I have another early day tomorrow. Color me excited.

Yours in Sarcastic Early Mornings,
Robert

Day 2: "You've gotta bit of en eccent..."

Today marks the completion of 1/100th of my stay here in Sydney, so I've vowed to make the other 99 percent more eventful. This will, hopefully, make these posts more interesting. You're welcome.


I've begun making friends around the guest house, all of whom have made note of my strange take on the English language. Yeah, look who's talking, Larry. Everybody's been nice so far though. As far as I can tell, I'm one of the few young people living here, which will come in handy should I have to battle for bathroom rights. I may talk funny, but I reckon I can take most of these old guys in a footrace.

I spent most of the day walking around town, taking in Cronulla -a suburb of Sydney- about 20 miles south of the Opera House, and 42 Wallaby Way. The guest house is a five minute walk from the ocean, and a walkway follows the coast for miles in each direction, which is where I spent much of my time. Along the way are countless public parks and in a few places, they've constructed public pools that are filled by the high tide. Even more shocking was that people were actually swimming in them, joined by various seabirds, not a bottle of hand sanitizer in sight. The birds here are much more vocal than any back home, so when they gather in the trees in the evening, the sound is tremendous. Some of them have pretty colors though, so I guess I'll let the noise slide.

The weather was a bit warmer today and the sun finally appeared, which was a nice change from the clouds. I'd hoped that by some hemisphere-acle that the days wouldn't be shortened by the winter, but alas, it's pitch black by 17:30 (they use the metric system for time down here...). It's still fairly cold, but the caretaker gave me another blanket, so I think I'll live to see another morning.

Tomorrow I have my first three dives of the trip, so I'd best be getting to bed. My days will usually be starting around 6 AM, which kinda breaks my heart. But considering I'm not waking up to the Mojave Desert, I don't mind all that much.

Yours in Early Rising,
Robert